


On the Way to Grand Things

by ninnie_eats_chips



Series: Asymmetry [5]
Category: Final Fantasy XIV
Genre: Au Ra Warrior of Light (Final Fantasy XIV), Developing Relationship, F/M, Female Warrior of Light (Final Fantasy XIV), Light Angst, Patch 5.1: Vows of Virtue; Deeds of Cruelty Spoilers, Pining, Reflection, Romantic Fluff, Slow Romance, also some talk of death, being stupidly in love but won't SAY IT, no plot just feelings., totally not almost a date
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-11-08
Updated: 2019-11-08
Packaged: 2021-01-25 16:09:25
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,651
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21358996
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ninnie_eats_chips/pseuds/ninnie_eats_chips
Summary: As she came to be roped into talking about herself again, she settled comfortably next to her old flame. Basked in the warmth of G’raha’s presence. Even in the silences that occasionally brought her cheeks to a flush and forced her to cover her lips with her palm and look away in bashfulness, there was a unique comfort to be found.
Relationships: G'raha Tia | Crystal Exarch/Original Character(s), G'raha Tia | Crystal Exarch/Warrior of Light
Series: Asymmetry [5]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1539757
Comments: 4
Kudos: 47





	On the Way to Grand Things

**Author's Note:**

> There, I did the thing!!  
...And I'm writing backwards. Oops, okay I had to start with some 5.1 stuff because they gave me SO MUCH FEELS. But there is referenced stuff from main ShB that I fully intend to go back and write. And I'm starting a series of all the G'raha/Lilium stuff I am gonna write. ;v;
> 
> This is pretty canon-compliant! I don't usually like to retcon much with my OC's because I'm boring.  
Alisaie isn't jealous, that's like the only thing. She's young. They have that family/friend relationship but she's still got that protective streak like "that is my SISTER, don't break her heart or I will break YOU." That's how I see it. xD
> 
> Anyway, if you're at all curious about what Lilium looks like, there's a few pics and some drawings on my Twitter (and more G'raha & WoL/Exarch)~  
https://twitter.com/cactwerk

As she made for Sullen alongside her comrades, Lilium found that she could not help but have an extra onze of energy in her steps. And with that energy, an extra onze of determination, and even an onze of nervousness for how she might perform in the battles yet to come.

She pondered all of this while staying at the back of the group, behind the twins and Y’shtola, and behind G’raha Tia. Better that no one—but especially Alisaie and Y’shtola, could not see how she  _ gawped _ at her old friend. She was glad for the latter being blind, at times.

There was a feeling that kept burbling up inside, difficult to contain. _She rarely saw him in the light of day,_ her mind argued against the onslaught of imaginary teases that played out. For it had only been in the dim, cool light of the Ocular that Lilium normally saw him. Making prominent the sleepless nights, his skin appearing pallid while his cerulean arm shone ever bright and ethereal against a backdrop of crystal. His back always turned to the portal with which she _knew_ he scryed on her when she was out and about on dangerous adventures, when he could not be with her. G’raha always stayed behind and guarded his tower, governing its magicks in solitude. And though it did afford him wondrous, and at times _immense_ power, Lilium couldn’t help but feel sometimes that this was his prison. A cell he was assigned to for crimes he did not commit.

But for now, he was  _ here.  _ And she couldn’t wipe the smile off her face for it. 

G’raha looked well. Much better than the last time she’d seen him. Though it was more than just being glad for his well-being, she had to admit. She felt at ease at the sound of G’raha’s voice as he explained something or other to Alphinaud; somehow, still almost as bright and whimsical as the day they had met. She admired the sun on his hair and the gentle breeze that tousled it when it blew, caressing the tufts of fur on his ears at once. And when he would turn to see that she was still following close behind, Lilium would give into the warmth of his eyes and his gentle smile, and find herself grinning back. Oh, did that make her cheeks burn. Her own tail swaying slightly  _ faster _ behind her person.

… As fate would have it, Alisaie also chanced a look back. She had caught the tail-end of the exchange, the amorous grin stuck to the Au Ra’s lips—and supplied a knowing grin of her own. Lilium shifted her eyes toward her feet.

_ Drat. She would have to stop doing that. _

Once they had reached the pier of Sullen, securing a couple rowboats for their venture across the lake seemed as easy as pie. The residents who owned them were all too eager to loan them to the Exarch and the Warriors of Darkness. In fact, they were willing to do so even before G’raha elaborated as to their cause. Something that Lilium would have to file away for future perusal. Although she didn’t like to take advantage of the kindness of strangers overmuch, the idea of taking a leisurely ride over the Source once or twice wouldn’t be a bad way to spend a lazy afternoon. Perhaps G’raha would fancy coming along sometime? Another excuse to steal him away from that dreary tower. A day would surely not be enough to close the century gap between them, and there would be much and more to say, if given the proper time...

But for today, there was a mission: to gain the ear of that reclusive Nu Mou, whom G’raha believed possessed the knowledge pertaining to the soul that he himself did not. Lilium would need to focus for the sake of her friends’ souls. All of that other stuff, what could be considered  _ dillydallying _ and  _ yes, _ even matters of the heart—though she was loath to admit it—could wait.

Or so she had thought. Said friends seemed to be taking the whole thing… rather lightly. As they seemed to have all the time in the world to continue to make snide comments toward the guest of the hour.

“I must say Exarch, you do seem rather excited about all this.” Alisaie quipped toward him with a smirk, to which he seemed to be almost prepared to defend after a fraction of a glance in her direction. She might’ve bit back an amused grin if the whole thing weren’t downright  _ embarrassing. _

_ ‘Oh, Raha… Sod it…! I am  _ ** _so_ ** _ sorry.’ _

Y’shtola brought the younger one’s attention back to matters at hand with a quiet clap. “Yes, well, you will have plenty of time to celebrate her good health  _ after _ we’ve finished here.”

On one hand, Lilium mentally thanked her. On the other hand, she  _ thanked _ her, as the look she was again forced to trade with G’raha while he stuttered in agreement returned the heat to her cheeks. It was the type of thing that kept Lilium guessing whether Y’shtola was a decidedly blunt, focus-minded individual, or just as bad as Alisaie in her own right. As of yet, she afforded her the benefit of the doubt.

With her hands clasped behind her back, resting against the cool metal of her staff, Lilium swayed her shoulders side-to-side, absentmindedly averting her eyes to the lake.  _ Well… If he were truly excited about this, he could not be more excited than she. _

“Right, then… How shall we divide ourselves amongst them?” Alphinaud asked.

The tip of Lilium’s tail perked behind her back.

“Ah, may I go with G’raha?” She waited a beat just to avoid her more intuitive friend’s lingering gaze (it didn’t work), and then quickly reclasped her hands together in front of her. Her eyes fell on G’raha just in time to catch the flick of his ear at the sound of his name. “I’ve not had an opportunity to talk to you as friends since coming back to the First… Besides, I think the twins will fit fine opposite Y’shtola?” Lilium looked to him further for permission.

She saw only the corners of his lips turn up. Luckily, he seemed keen on the idea. And Y’shtola made a quiet hum of approval.

“Yes, I  _ do  _ believe that would be the optimal arrangement.” She said in a singsong voice. “And considering I cannot well  _ see…  _ Alphinaud, Alisaie—You two best decide quick who will be commanding this vessel. I’ll not hear the bickering of siblings sullying this otherwise pristine lake.”

A chuckle escaped from Lilium as the twins’ heads snapped in one another’s direction, their attentions effectively turned away as they scrambled to play some game with their hands to determine who would be rowing.  _ Still children. _ She would have to thank Y’shtola later for taking her selfishness in such great stride. Perhaps treat her to some tea and pastries.

“I’m sorry, it seems you didn’t have much of a say in the matter.” She apologized as G’raha knelt to carefully drop a satchel of traveling supplies into the boat, but there was a smile in her voice just as much as on her lips.

“As if I’d have it any other way, my friend. Also-“ His scarlet eyes traveled over the pier to the Leveilleurs who were already climbing in and each held out a hand to help the woman down. “I think Y’shtola may have bit the arrowhead this time around.”

* * *

Lilium sat as a passenger and watched the clouds, the dreamy hues of the local flora reflecting on the shimmering surface of the Source as their boat rolled over the water. She tried not to focus too much on G’raha as he leaned forward and back, keeping up a good pace as his arms worked the oars in a circular motion. Lilium had offered—nearly insisted to row. It didn’t seem like the activity would be  _ too _ tiring on her arms, especially since she had opted for spells over her bow. They had agreed they would take breaks when needed. Not to mention she wasn’t sure  _ what  _ exactly she would do with her idle hands, save hold them in her lap and twiddle her thumbs from time to time. Trace a finger along the ridges of her scales and stare into the crystal clear waters when the act of keeping up conversation became too much.

That was an awful way to think, wasn’t it? Of any conversation being too much, emotionally or otherwise, with the man she had longed for a pleasant moment with since she’d seen him for who he really was. With the man who had waited so many years without believing he would enjoy a similar moment… No, it was not quite tiredness or mundaneness, or dullness that Lilium feared. Not from him, at least… It was more a mere worry. A little concern about being swept up in the moment for too long, and… she didn’t _know—_saying something asinine? It wouldn’t have been the first time, after all.

But Lilium was pleased to find that, as they glided along, there was nothing  _ too much _ . And as she came to be roped into talking about herself again, she settled comfortably next to her old flame. Basked in the warmth of G’raha’s presence. Even in the silences that occasionally brought her cheeks to a flush and forced her to cover her lips with her palm and look away in bashfulness, there was a unique comfort to be found. It was once their boat was far enough that the familiar shore and the Crystal Tower were a blur of colors in the distance and her comrades’ vessel raced on ahead, that Lilium felt that silence become pregnant with unsaid words. Her lips pressed together, unable to but stare through G’raha laboring in front of her before slowing to a stop and allowing the slight, natural pull of the water carry them a few fulms on its own. By then, he seemed to have noticed her stillness, brows curling with the look of concern.

“Is something troubling you?”

Lilium’s tail lifted at its spiny edge, tapping a couple times lightly on the wooden seat beside her. G’raha’s words from the Ocular, having once left her speechless as they were overshadowed, chose this time to stew. They  _ troubled _ her, for sure.

_ “... Should all else fail, and your lives be at stake, there remains one sure method…” _

She curled her lips in, licking them contemplatively. Then she forced a small smile.

“I’m really happy you’re here. Excited, even.”

G’raha’s ears twisted slightly and Lilium watched as his frown was replaced by a genuine smile. “As am I. I can’t tell you how much I’ve longed to join you on your adventures.”

“I believe you did, once~” 

“Ah, Kholusia…” G’raha blushed. 

_ Kholusia,  _ he’d said. More specifically, he meant before the events of Mt. Gulg. But with good reason, neither of them desired to revisit  _ that. _

Back then, Lilium had considered him a comrade. An ally. The word  _ “friend” _ flowing steadily and constantly from his lips like a stream, but a relatively fresh one to her own by the time she had seated herself beside him on the cliffside. It was almost ridiculous to her now in hindsight that she hadn’t figured him out. She had only seen a man, well-mannered and wise exceeding that of his youthful appearance (or what she could make of it beneath his cowl). But one that yearned for adventure, nonetheless. A desire to  _ “soar upon the eternal winds.”  _ With no other context, she’d taken him to mean wanderlust. Something Lilium herself had possessed since childhood. Whatever it was, the Exarch’s words resonated with her that day, and she made a rather empty promise to herself that she would grant him that desire, however much or little the tower would allow his body to indulge. Lilium had made the same promise to the willful historian, backs leaning on cold runes and eyes not even meeting. Wrapping minor wounds from battles that would feel like a training exercise now. Taking everything at face value. Talking of the morrow while having not the faintest idea of what the morrow held for them. 

Today, it seemed, she could finally make good on that long kept promise, if even only slightly.

_ But G’raha had to know. _ He had to know if she had to remind him a thousand times, until she was blue in the face and her very scales molted off in protest...

“Raha...” She started softly, noting the way he seemed to tense and relax at once; equally giving into the intimate way she called him in private as he stiffened to the sudden seriousness in her eyes. After another moment of silence, Lilium leaned forward some, laying her palms on her knees. As quickly as the giddiness had come before, she managed to drain it.

“You have to live.” She clutched her knee. Her words echoed a tearful moment in the Ocular following Hades’ defeat and G’raha’s failed attempt at sacrifice. The knot that formed in Lilium’s throat as she recalled one of her less fine moments made it almost too difficult to swallow. The thought of him dying, the thought of truly losing him made the tears threaten to spill over a second time. G’raha’s ears fell low. 

_ No, she would not cry this time and ruin what time they had together. This was to be a part of their adventure. And it would return to being a happy memory once she’d finished. _

“You heard what Alisaie said.” Lilium sighed through her nostrils, adopting a softer tone. “You don’t get to die unless I tell you to… And I will  _ never _ tell you to… I just want you to know that.”

Somehow, that helped. Tension slowly but surely left her body, and Lilium’s fingers unclenched themselves. Though now there was the slight feeling of guilt as he sat there speechless, mouth somewhat ajar and ears still drooping over heavy words.

“Besides,” She began with a small smile, watching those ears finally perk up. “You’re still a historian at heart, aren’t you? Someone must be there to bear witness to the deeds of adventurers such as myself, lest we question the credibility of their claims. And if I recall correctly, dead men tell no such tales.”

“Hah!” Lilium chuckled as the glow that was formerly present returned to G’raha’s face. Much to her relief, she guessed she hadn’t  _ completely _ spoiled the journey. By now he had fully relaxed and leaned back on the seat with his hands.

“I must say, just now you sounded a bit like myself back then…”

“I guess you left a good impression on me?” 

“... Thank you, Lily.” G’raha’s face softened as he spoke, and at that moment Lilium felt the oddest spark that bloomed from the inside-out, causing her to flush. Was this what it felt like when she called him by his name?

“We’ll stand together. And I will do everything in my power to help you—Precluding death, of course… Oh! I’d almost forgotten-—”

Lilium tilted her head curiously. She eyed him as he stopped short of grabbing the oars again, at first turning to affirm that the other boat had long raced out of sight, then leaning forward and fumbling under his seat for the satchel. G’raha reached inside and pulled out something smaller that was wrapped in a familiar checkered cloth. Lilium was beaming before he’d even finished unwrapping it, revealing a grouping of four handmade half-sandwiches tucked neatly into a basket.

“I thought it might be best not to go into battle on an empty stomach.”

“Playing at favoritism, are we?” She jested while reaching for a sandwich when offered, the pride in his handiwork plain on his face.

“Are we not?”

**Author's Note:**

> *Warms myself over the 2 whole softly smoldering coals of this slow burn*  
One day, an entire can of gasoline will fall on top....
> 
> Thanks for reading my first fic with my WoL!! I really appreciate it and hope to continue developing her for fic. <3


End file.
